|Boring day, random thoughts
||[Aug. 13th, 2003|03:53 pm]
I added to my user info page, in case anyone's interested. Now I feel that my interests and bio truly represent myself. I know I'm a dork, and proud of it! And if you're wondering if I have anything better to do, the answer is that I really don't. I'm off work today, am done making cookies for the party, and am anxiously awaiting the return of my family.
The melancholy of yesterday has worn off, so I'm once again optimistic. It's strange because I've been depressed for so long, and it's been wearing off the past couple months. I don't feel like myself, yet on the other hand I feel more myself than I have in years. I hope this makes sense.
And I don't feel lonely any more--there are people all around me who care about me, and that makes me happier than I could even begin to describe. Everything's going to be okay, and for once, I actually feel that this is true. The world's going to hell (and it doesn't belong there!) but I don't think this is how the world will end. Sure, perhaps this will be the end of humanity, but not of the world. Perhaps it will come back in a form more beautiful than it ever has been before--who knows? Or perhaps not, but I for one am hoping (and working) for the latter to come true. And I'm definitely not alone. There are people all over who are willing to help things change. And if this minority grows and becomes a majority, there's no telling what can be accomplished.
I am working to take off my cultural eyeglasses and see with my own two eyes, but it's incredibly hard sometimes. Our culture keeps shoving them back on. But trying is at least doing something, so I will keep at it and will perhaps, one day, learn to see on my own. I can't wait.
Until then, I will keep on studying, so that one day I'll have the opportunity to make a difference. Or perhaps I'm making one already at the wildlife center--who knows? I haven't single-handedly saved any lives, but I've helped others to save them. And even that is something.
Well, my point of these ramblings is to keep trying to make a difference, even if it doesn't seem like you're getting anywhere. Every blade of grass saved, every insect honored, every life changed is one step towards saving the world. For perhaps it will save itself, but how are we to know?