|Work worries--a LOT of them. I need reassurance...
||[Jan. 6th, 2006|08:51 pm]
I haven't been feeling very included at work lately. I know I probably am and it's just my horrible worries getting in the way, but it seems everyone is in on something wonderful that I'm not. I hate when I get like that, not least because it's probably only how things seem, rather than how they actually are.|
I got sort-of promoted today, though. Jannelle (who does the actual Barnes and Noble part of the store...trade books) has been way too busy to keep up with her job so I've been picked to split it with her. Not much, maybe a couple hours a day. She trained me on how to update the bestseller displays, order new fiction/nonfiction books, process staff recommendations, and organize that part of the store.
Strangely enough though, I'm not that excited about it. I know I'll be excited later and that it's a great thing, but I suppose it was just how today was. It just seemed, like I said, that I was taken for granted by a lot of people.
I know for a fact this was just a lot of coincidences and no one actually was taking me for granted, but besides being promoted I kinda felt like the "old gray mule" (and yes, I absolutely hate that term but can think of no better one for this). I guess it was because I'm now seen as kinda "higher" than the new people (who I like very much, and really want to fit in with), and "lower" than the more experienced people because I'm new among them. I'm not feeling like I fit in anywhere.
Also, people kept asking me for help in the morning from completely different ends of the store (sometimes two or three at once), and it was maddening. I know I should be happy my help is so valued, but instead I just felt used and taken advantage of. I just feel like everyone in the store is enjoying each other's company except me...having so much fun, and I'm stuck as the polite one who is there when she's needed.
I don't know how to handle this. Do you think these worries are justified? Do you have any words of advice or comfort?